Monday, October 13, 2014

Don’t Judge & Hate. Empathize & Love

I have always worked hard to be an empathetic, open minded person. The kind of person to advocate for those in need and stick up for what is right. I would have been hurt, angry and offended to be called judgmental or lacking empathy. However, that is exactly what I was, judgmental.

I wasn’t the kind of person to judge the homeless person on the corner, other religious affiliations, races or cultures. I was the person who judged the jobless, the people on unemployment. I used to think people on long-term unemployment or the people who were jobless for more than six months were lazy. I couldn’t understand why they couldn’t find a job in six-months and I thought it had to be because they weren’t trying. Why would “they” work when “they” could get paid to stay home and not work?
It wasn’t until I was forced into that very situation that I realized how wrong I was. The first unemployment check I received shocked me into the realization that if I didn’t get a job immediately or have savings, then I would never survive this unemployment, because my monthly unemployment benefits were far from enough to pay my bills. I desperately wanted to find a job, so I knew with 100 percent certainty of my financial future. If the financial uncertainty of joblessness didn’t push me toward finding a job, then the treatment I received from the employees at the unemployment office sure would. The underpaid, overworked employees, who were used to dealing with the frightened, stressed out jobless completely lacked empathy. In every interaction, I was treated like an idiot trying to take advantage of the system. If only they understood, I would have done anything to not have to be on unemployment. As I sent resume after resume and went on interview after interview I realized that I am now the person I once judged so harshly.
I’ve learned a lot since I lost my job, but the lesson I am most proud and most ashamed to have learned is to never judge. It is so easy to form an opinion about a group, situation, etc., but until you are standing knee deep in it you have no idea. Remember to empathize and extend yourself to think beyond the first impression and judgment.
Don’t judge and hate. Empathize and love one another, and together we make a better community.

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