Excellence Is Just Past Your Comfort Zone

Within the last year, I interviewed for a marketing director position, and at the conclusion of the interview I asked them what they considered to be their biggest marketing obstacle. They told me they had always had great success building relationships with organizations. They would fly into a city, bring delicious food and drinks, have a great time and by the end of the visit they’d have large orders. However, now that strategy is no longer working. The world is moving faster and no one has time for that anymore. We spoke a lot about traditional, social and digital advertising. During the conversation, I mentioned that digital advertising is very powerful and it is accounting for over 50 percent of many marketing budgets. I also told them traditional advertising has become antiquated; however, it still has a place in the media mix. The interviewer's response was traditional advertising is dying, but it isn’t dead yet; and we are going to keep using it. That one statement told me it all. That company is so afraid of venturing outside of their comfort zone they would rather continue with a strategy they confess is no longer working.  

These interviewers aren’t alone, we have all been afraid to step out of our comfort zone and try something new. It is what we do when given the chance that makes the difference between growth or stagnation, success or failure, excellence or mediocrity.

Stepping out of your comfort zone is a constant work in progress.

·         Start small: 

o   You don’t have to shock your system with huge changes, baby steps will help, too. You can start with things as small as trying a menu item, restaurant, or sport. Or,   something new every day and integrate what you’ve learned in your life.    

·         Don’t be afraid to make a fool of yourself:

o   Everyone respects someone working toward improvement. Even if you fail, make a mistake or temporarily embarrass yourself, you will never be a fool. Just keep trying! 

·         Don’t be afraid to fail:  

o   Even if you fail you succeed, because every failure comes with a lesson. Some of the best insight and education comes from mistakes/failure.    

What have you done in order to move outside of your comfort zone?

Small Gestures, Big Impact

Normally, I write about business, the workplace or the marketing industry, but something in my life stopped me in my tracks. My niece told me she read my “How to Handle the Wicked Witch” blog post, and she told me she could relate. She told me that my blog post sounded a lot like middle school and what she was going through. Now, we all remember middle school, and we all know that kids are exceptionally cruel during that time. However, it broke my heart to hear that she was being made fun of or being bullied. We had a long talk about what had been happening to her, and after our conversation I thought about how lucky she is. She has amazing, supportive parents, friends and family who she can talk to about whatever hurts her, and every one of those people would go to bat for her if needed. I told her she was lucky and then I told her this story.

I was a very lucky kid. Yes, I was made fun of at times, but no more or less than any other average kid. When I was in high school, I was in a very small computational science class that consisted of maybe eight kids, two of which were girls. During the semester, the high school math teacher and the high school librarian, who taught the class, took the class to Iowa State University for a computational science event. Since the class was so small we could all fit in one van. If you know anything about Iowa State University you know that there are farm animals leading up to Ames that are used for educational purposes. As soon as one of the boys saw the cows he yelled, “Look! There is Kelly. Mooo!” Today, I can’t remember which boy yelled the statement, but what is burned into my brain is both of the teachers laughed. I was so embarrassed by the teachers’ laughter that I never told anyone…until now. I told my niece this story, because I wanted her to know that she should never be too embarrassed to tell her family anything, one day the cruelty of middle school will fade, and adults are not always right and kind.

I’m telling you this story, because I can’t tell you enough how much impact you have on the life of a young person. If you hear or observe teasing, taunting or bullying please don’t laugh, ignore or walk away. Please help! Your kind words, playing a game, watching a movie, helping them with their homework, going to their events or offering a listening ear can all have a momentous effect on the life of a young person.

Sometimes the smallest gestures make the biggest impact. You can make a difference, and you can make the world a little brighter.

 

Me (circa 1997, high school)

Building Confidence the Stuart Smalley Way

Does anyone else remember Stuart Smalley? He was a character created and performed by Al Franken for Saturday Night Live. Maybe this video will help ring a bell.

                                                              http://youtu.be/6ldAQ6Rh5ZI

I remember watching his Daily Affirmation comedy sketch as a 13 year old girl and thinking OMG that guy is a dork. Now, many years later, I still think this guy is a dork, but I also think he may be on to something.

There are moments in every person’s life when they struggle with self doubt and lack confidence. Every time I lead a new project or faced a new problem/decision I had to fight through self doubt. My mind began to flood with thoughts like:  Is this the correct decision? What will the haters say? What will happen if this is wrong? Will I cost the company hundreds or thousands of dollars? Will I get written up? Will I get fired? Will I cost the company revenue? Will it hurt the reputation of the company? Will it hurt the reputation of the marketing department? My thoughts went on and on, and eventually, I was able to squash the self doubt by doing the following:

• Identify your strengths and weaknesses
• We all have strengths and weaknesses, and it is those weaknesses that tear at our confidence the most. Identify your weaknesses and work on improving them. Every time you grow and overcome a weakness, your confidence will grow, too. However, remember, to integrate your strengths into everything you do. Using your strengths naturally boosts your self confidence, and it will also keep you energized as you are working toward self improvement.   
• Remember your successes
• As humans we have this crazy ability to focus on the negative and ignore the positive. However, we are the culmination of both our successes and failures. When you are facing something new, remember all of the great work and judgments you have had in the past. When I self doubt I think of three specific successes that were particularly hard, and I remind myself that I managed those projects and situations successfully. If I could come out of those projects or situations with great success, then I can do anything.  However, when I can’t take my own word, I let others speak for me. Every time someone sent me an email or card congratulating me on a job well done, I keep them for this type of occasion.
• Stuart Smalley was right
• Hard work and experience help dull the noise of self doubt; however, nothing quiets it more than positive self talk. Stop, take a deep breath and take inventory of the situation. Then remind yourself that you are a successful, experienced professional and you can do it.

I was able to squash the self doubt, but not totally kill it. I am extremely confident in my decision making, experience, knowledge and talent. However, I am only human and there are moments when a desire for perfection can get the best of me and make me question myself. When this occurs, I remind myself of my successes and strengths and move forward, because as Stuart Smalley said…

I’m good enough

I’m smart enough

And, doggone it, people like me

How to Handle the Wicked Witch

I have been in the workforce for nearly 20 years, and one thing I have learned is the workforce is a lot like the Wizard of Oz. There are people like Glenda the Good Witch, working to guide you safely down the path to your dreams. And, there are people like Dorothy’s other three friends Scarecrow, Cowardly Lion and Tin Man giving you knowledge, courage and heart on your way to success. However, for every friend there is a foe. There is a Wicked Witch of the West and her band of minions waiting to gang up on you, steal your ideas, blame you and erode your self-esteem. And then, there is the Wicked Witch of the East, always looking to keep you down in order to help herself up.

If you are lucky you only meet Dorothy’s friends on your journey to success. Unfortunately, I have met them both. However, those terrible experiences have given me the tools and the experience to protect myself and persevere down the yellow brick road.

• Have you met a Wicked Witch?
• At times, the workplace takes a thick skin. Tempers flair, disagreements occur and stress can turn anyone into a temporary Wicked Witch. These interactions are interactions that need to be ignored and chalked up to a bad day. Like in high school and the Wizard of Oz, the Wicked Witch may make everyone’s life hell or bring others in to help with their shenanigans, but they usually pick one person in which to focus their attention. So, if you find yourself singled out to hostility, threatening, abusive, humiliating, intimidating, and sabotaging behavior then you have met a Wicked Witch.  
• Stand up for yourself
• Stay strong and don’t let the Wicked Witch erode your self esteem. Stick up for yourself and calmly let her know that her behavior is unacceptable, unappreciated and will not be tolerated. Don’t get into a fight, but stand up for yourself.   
• Ask for help
• If your attempts to try to calmly put an end to the behavior are not working speak to your supervisor. If your supervisor allows the behavior to continue then go to human resources.
• Move forward 
• If all of your efforts melted the Wicked Witch then be ready to work on repairing your working relationship with your teammate formerly known as the Wicked Witch and move forward. However, if all of your efforts do not quell the Wicked Witch then maybe it is time to leave and find a new job. Dealing with these type of temperaments, interactions and environments – let’s call it what it is, BULLYING - can harm your health and mental health. So, take care of yourself and bring your experience and knowledge to an organization that can and will provide you with the safe environment you deserve.    

Luckily, in the movie, the wicked witches get what they deserve. But in real life, the wicked witches are resilient and the water and the house don’t kill them. However, you can move from I’ll get you my pretty to we’re all in this together.

Have you ever been bullied in the workplace? If so, how did you handle the situation?

 

Dear New College Graduates

After college graduation, I had an idealistic view of what the workforce would be like. I thought everything I learned in college was 100% correct and the way everything had to be done. I thought a degree meant the end of demeaning job duties. I thought a job in my chosen field meant I would make enough money to support myself. I thought I was qualified for a marketing manager or director position. I thought people would want to teach me. Boy was I wrong! My salary was barely enough to support myself. There is NO training in marketing – it is sink or swim. What I learned almost immediately is from press releases to marketing plans EVERY organization does it differently. A degree entitles you to nothing. The degree opens the door, but you have to pay your dues in order to clear the path to earn your way up the ladder.

How Kelly Got Her Groove Back

I wish I could say that I lost my groove in some love gone wrong, and it was magically returned to me during some tropical vacation with a muscle bound hottie on one arm and an umbrella drink in the other. Unfortunately, my story is not quite so glamorous.

My groove was lost September 2013, but I guess you could say it was starting to go a little before that date. September 2013, one of the worst days of my life, was when my job of six years as an advertising and public relations manager was eliminated. I was completely blindsided, and for weeks I couldn’t believe it was real. Every day I desperately tried to wrap my head around what just happened. I mean, how could my position be eliminated when I have always been so swamped with work. Every night, I cried myself to sleep and dreamt that they asked me to return to work. For months, I was an open wound. A once social person, I avoided my friends and meeting new people. I didn’t give a lot of thought about what my true passions consisted of; the only thing I cared about was finding a job.